Thursday, July 27, 2006
A snake, a condom, a bottle of pills, and a role model
So, lets count out the things that Ive seen this week while I was running:

A dead, bloated snake. Ew, how horribly gross.

A bottle of pills for Dara Coats from Las Vegas, Nevada. I couldn't tell for what, because I didnt want to be seen holding a mysterious bottle of pills in the middle of the street.

A used condom....double ew.

Coach Baker.

Hmmm...what was so notable about seeing Coach Baker? Coach Baker was the first black male that I ever had for a teacher or a coach. To some people it wouldnt really make sense that its notable that I think of my my first black male teacher so highly, but in the life of a student (a person who is not me) that has no male role models, let alone black male role models in the classroom, it is completely wonderous to have someone who represents a positive image to students.

I spoke on the phone to two different people today equaling an amount of time for over an hour. Dag, I'm becoming such a phone-talking-facebooker.

posted by DeAndre' @ 8:37 PM   0 comments

Baby I Swear Its Deja Vu

Lord, please don't ever let me make a music video, because people are CRAZY.

Thanks to Crunk+Disorderly for the heads up.

To: Columbia Records, A Division of Sony BMG

This petition is for the advocacy of having Ms. Beyonce' Knowles, Columbia Records, Music World Entertainment, and all other entities associated with the creative process of creating the long-form music video known as "Deja Vu" reshoot aforementioned video immediately.

This video is an underwhelming representation of the talent and quality of previous music video projects of Ms. Knowles. The following problems have been pointed out by numerous fans on and offline:

A) There is no clear story or theme to the video
B) The dancing is erratic, confusing and alarming at times
C) The sexual themes and shots between Ms. Knowles and Mr. Sean Carter PKA Jay-Z, are alarming and show unacceptable interactions between the two
D) The fashion in this video, while haute-couture, is unbelievable and ridiculous
E) The editing, while professionally done, causes one to get dizzy and disoriented
F) The overall feel of the video leaves a sense of much to be desired
G) The video is very disappointing and is not a clear representation of any of the songs themes

We, the fans of one Beyonce' Knowles, ask that an alternative video be shot featuring; more choreographed & less spontaneous dancing, clearer visual themes that relate to the lyrics of the song, less gyrating, less scenes of non-existent sexual chemistry between Mr. Carter and Ms. Knowles, less zooming and quick cut edits and a more stylized and clear direction for all other aspects of the video production.

Suggested in this re-shoot would be the hire of another producer besides Ms. Sophie Mueller -- one more acclimated to urban themes and imagery in music videos, other than Hype "Letterbox" Williams.


The Undersigned

What do you think? I mean, she do be flailing around, but really... a petition? Check out the vid and see for yourself.

posted by DeAndre' @ 8:33 PM   0 comments

Friday, July 21, 2006
An Open Letter

Dear Wayans Brothers,


Sincerely, America
posted by DeAndre' @ 10:01 PM   0 comments

Thursday, July 20, 2006
I was at WalMart today and I totally saw Kirsten Dunst. Then I realized that it was just a pasty young woman who needed a meal.

posted by DeAndre' @ 3:10 PM   0 comments

Dang you ants!
So, I've cut myself twice in the last three weeks. Not in like a self-harming way, but by being extremely clumsy. The first time I was cutting an apple and got distracted and dern near sliced through my thumb. Then yesterday I was slicing cookie dough and I cut my other thumb. What's really going on in my unverse?

I went to Six Flags over Texas last week with the fam. Not only my parents and sister, but THE FAM. That means five of my moms nine siblings, and all of their bad children. We were at WalMart the night before and almost got thrown out because they kept running around, throwing footballs, breaking china, looking suspicous, screaming and whatnot. We were on this ride, Judge Riley Scream, or something, and at the end of the ride, one of m cousins screamed out "WHAT THE F***" just because he felt like it. This little boy next to him repeated it and his mom told he not to. He said it again and he got a beatdown, all because of my cousin.

So, I'm sitting watching the Six Flags performers lypsync their way through a 20 minute performance about the yellow rose of Texas and how great Six Glafs is and blah-blah. I'm sitting on this sort of triangular stone thing on grass with a flower bed in the middle.

These bad kids, who were not related to me, btw, were sitting behind me, and their being pretty loud, and then they get quiet. I dont really notice because I'm watching this thick girl lyp sync to Celebrate Good Times Come On (She wasnt fat per se, her outfit just didnt fit her) and then the little boys go "Hey, you have ants on you" THESE BAD LITTLE KIDS HAD BEEN PLAYING IN AN ANTBED, ET ANTS CRAWL INTO MY PANTS AND DRAWS AND THEN TELL ME THAT I HAVE ANTS ON ME....LIKE ITS MY FAULT.

I had to go to the filthy Six Flags restroom, take off all my clothes and shoes, and shake ants out of them. Did I mention that I am allergic to ants? So I have huge larger than life ant bits all over me...and dangerously close to my junk. I was rather upset.

OK, rant over. Peace

D Urbn

PS everyone watch Project Runway! It is the ish!
posted by DeAndre' @ 9:17 AM   0 comments

Wednesday, July 05, 2006
In the Case of 3 month old Dylan...You are NOT the Father!
"I have genital herpes.

I try not to let it control my life...but sometimes, its hard to remember to take all those pills...thats why I use Valtrex...I'm stopping the transmission of genital herpes by using it...and I feel good about that."

Come on, people. I do not need to see this inbetween episodes of Maury and Judge Hatchett...on second thoought...right now, the screen on Maury says "I Cheated With 2 Men...Our Baby May Not Be Yours!" Maybe that explains it.

ANywayz, I went out for my run today, and found a beer bottle in the front yard. So I threw it away, and walked to the neighbors house (not the adulturer's; the drug dealer's) and their house is littered with beer bottles. They had this huge party last night, because their parents went out of town...when will they get smart and realize their kids are bad and cannot be left alone?

Flashback to 4th of July about 4 or 5 years ago. They have a big party as we have a family reunion in our backyard, two guys start fighting over this painfully ugly girl (I mean really...she was UGLY...a cheerleader who tanned about every other day, and weighed abou tthe size of a tootsie role). One guy pulls out a gun and they start shooting.

Fastforward about 3 years. Little Johnny gets caught at school selling large amounts of coke and weed out of the back of his car.

Ahhh...so refreshing to see a family make the most of their oppurtunities.
posted by DeAndre' @ 12:27 PM   0 comments

Tuesday, July 04, 2006
Lite Bright
So I went to H-E-B to purchase some delicious apple caramel dip, and as I was leaving, this black woman came up to me and ask, "Excuse me, what is your race?," and I was like, "black."


Even taking in the fact that I have dreadlocks, and the fact that my complexion teeter-totters dangerously close to lite-brite, I can't really fathom what homegirl was getting at. Maybe she thought I was from the Carribean or something...hmmm. I'm watching Just Friends. Ill talk to you when its over. Lata/
posted by DeAndre' @ 6:46 PM   0 comments

I am afraid of Pickles.
Remember the post about that episode of Maury with the women who were afraid of various things?

The original post is under the March archive.

Here's a clip from it! Must see!! http://www.collegehumor.com/movies/1697545/

PS its raining now and that sucks.

posted by DeAndre' @ 11:35 AM   0 comments

Auf Wiedersehen
So, what do you do when you are bored, everyone hates you and those who dont are out of town on the 4th of July? Why, you watch the Project Runway marathon on Bravo!

While I'm watching, Ive been seeing the advertisements for something called Autocool. THe commercial starts with this woman getting into a car, and burning the mess out of her hands on the steering wheel. Quite humourous.

Anyway, Autocool clips on to the window of your car and is powered solarly to get a fan going that keeps your car cool. Heres the website. Not saying that you should buy one, but if you do, you should def let me know if it works. I mean, its 14.99, where can you go wrong?

Its back on, ttyl, omg, brb, wtf

Auf Wiedersehen
posted by DeAndre' @ 9:05 AM   0 comments

Monday, July 03, 2006
Pre 4th of July: Also, Desperate Housewives in Imperial Oaks?
So I've now watched Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunte Events, and the people next door are about to get on my nerves.

As a person who spends most of his day sleeping because he applied late to summer school and works from home, I see a lot of what goes on down the street. My sister believes that the woman nex door is having a hot steamy affair with the man down the street, because as soon as he goes to work, she dissapears down the street.

Anyway, she has no job, so she and he spend most of their time drinking alcohol in the middle of the day and popping out babies.

Today they are having some sort of early 4th celebration and making a racket. Bwah. I'm going to defrost this lasange for din-din...
posted by DeAndre' @ 3:02 PM   0 comments

So, Feminine Hygeine commercials seen today: 0. Another day of victory.

Perhaps the reason that there have been none is because I have been watching HBO all day. So far I have seen Fear featuring Mark Whalberg and Reese Witherspoon, A Lot Like Love, with Ashton Kutcher, and I am currently on Without a Paddle...I came in 10 minutes late, and you guys know how much I hate that.


Somebody call me or IM me and hang out with me, keyword being ME.

posted by DeAndre' @ 1:56 PM   0 comments

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Name: DeAndre'
Home: Waco, Texas, United States
Who Am I?: This one time I decided that everything in my life would be in musical form. ANd everyone would automatically know the words and the choreography and sing on key. You see how well that turned out.
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